


Like Fuel Into A Fire

by Kunstpause



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-08-22 02:17:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8268925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kunstpause/pseuds/Kunstpause
Summary: "Had we met at another point in my life I think we could have probably been friends."





	

Isabela sat down with a large tankard of ale in her hands. “Are they fighting again?” With a nod of her head she indicated towards the closed door a few feet away through which they could clearly hear some muffled shouting.

Fenris just lifted an eyebrow and took another swing of his drink as if he deemed the question unworthy of an actually spoken out loud answer.

Varric had no such qualms. “What gave it away? The fact that they are both missing or the headache inducing shouting match that has been going on for at least fifteen minutes?”

Aveline was looking from her food towards the door with a resigned expression. “Maybe I should go in there and break them up.”

“Nah, leave them,” Isabela put the tankard down to steal a potato from Aveline’s plate. “It’s how they communicate. Like, friendship building, but for socially horribly inept people.” Varric chuckled next to her.

“Hey!” Sounded Carver’s slightly insulted sounding voice. “My sister is not socially horribly inept!” Nearly everyone at the table shot him a look that made him almost flinch. 

“She threatened to cut the quartermaster's throat today about two minutes after she actually met the man.” Isabela noted.

“I hate to break it to you kid,” Varric’s spoke in his usual mix of joking and patronising that seemed to be exclusively reserved for dealing with Carver, “but your sister has kind of a hard time being calm and nice to people. If you ask me, kind of a cornerstone of social aptness.”

Carver sank back into his chair, mumbling something that sounded suspiciously like “no one actually asked you!”

\-------

“I really don’t know what else you want me to say.” Cassia was pacing up and down, too upset to even think about sitting down somewhere. They had been yelling at each other for what felt like ages. About the same topic that always got them up in arms. 

“What I want you to say is ‘Hm good point Anders, I should consider this because you may be right and I have been behaving like a selfish ass for the longest time’,” was the reply she got. Anders was furious. How in Thedas Cassia could not understand his point was beyond him. 

“Keep dreaming!” Cassia snarled at him. They had been arguing about whether her decision to convince the Starkhaven Mages to turn themselves in was the right one or not for the better part of the way back already. That didn’t lessen the intensity of their current argument in the least. She was getting frustrated and it showed. “I honestly don’t know what else to say, and damn it, you actually agreed with me in the cave!”

“Of course I damn well agreed with you, they were using blood magic!” Anders was yelling again. “Blood magic, Cassia. Remember that dangerous thing where they make deals with demons?” The look he gave he was almost vicious. “Oh wait, I forgot, you do that too…”

Cassia angrily pushed the chair she was standing next to away from her, making it clash against the wall loudly. “I know my limits very well, thank you. Unlike other people I did not actually let a demon or a spirit inside my body.” It was a good thing that the room was large enough to give them some space. If they had been any closer she would have probably lashed out at him at this moment. “But this is not what you were angry about earlier, was it?” She taunted. “You were upset about the Templar thing.” She threw that at him sounding almost triumphantly for figuring it out.

“What, me, a mage, upset about you, another mage saying that they would never consider going against a Templar?” Anders gestured mockingly at her. “What gave you the idea that that could be upsetting?” He was still furious at her. “You know what the Templars can do. You know exactly. You are hiding from them too!” Accusation and betrayal bled together in his voice. “So to hear you say you wouldn’t even consider it, not for anyone? Damn right I am angry. I help you out as good as I can when I am not down in the clinic and you made it pretty clear that you don’t have my back out there.”

If Cassia were in a calmer state of mind she would have noticed the hint of sadness as he said that. “I don’t have your back?” She looked at him as if he had lost his mind. “I don’t have your back?” Her yelling almost turned into screaming. “Do you have any idea how many nights I spent out in this damn city to make sure no patrol comes even near your clinic? Or Merrill’s home? How many times I delivered bribes and did favours for people? How often Varric and I sit together to map all this out so that no one in this stupid city touches our friends?” 

Anders visibly deflated in front of her. “You what?”

But Cassia wasn’t done yet. “Do you have any idea what I have to do day in and day out? I have to provide for my family. Make sure they can eat in that rathole we live in. And then make sure my mother actually does eat and doesn’t starve herself to death out of grief.” She drew in a deep breath. “And I have to stop Carver from doing something stupid because after a year he is still so upset about losing our sister he takes stupid risks all the time.” Anders tried to interrupt her but she was having none of it. “They are my family and I am responsible. I don’t expect someone who doesn’t have a family to understand.” She spat and he recoiled like she slapped him. She realised a second too late what she had actually said. “No Anders, that’s not how I meant this.” She cursed at herself silently. Then she did it again out loud. 

“I get it.” Anders said tonelessly. “And you are right in that regard, I couldn’t possibly understand how it is to have a family. And you know very well who made sure of that.” He looked as miserable as she felt at that moment.

 

“I need to go on this expedition, Anders. I need to make sure they are taken care off. And I can not afford offending the wrong people. Not even a little.” She didn’t yell or scream anymore as she went to pick the pushed chair up and sank down on it. “They are all I have left and if I get into trouble with the Templars, who will take care of them?” The question that wasn’t really an actual question hung in the room unanswered.

At the other side of the room Anders sank down to sit on the floor against the far wall. “Look, I may now know how it is to have a family, but I get the wanting to, no, needing to protect someone that depends on you part.” His voice had calmed down considerably. 

Cassia gave him a solemn nod. “I am sorry I can’t help you more. Believe me,” she pleaded. “I agree with you way more than you think I do sometimes. But this thing you are doing? Rallying people, working in some sort of underground, I just can’t help you with that.” She looked at him but he seemed to deliberately look past her. “You know, Justice actually told me a while ago that unless I am willing to do what is necessary I would be a rather useless ally.” Anders looked up sharply at those words. “But I am offering anyways. If there is something I can do that doesn’t get my family into danger I will.”

He met her eyes for the first time since their shouting match had started. The anger from their fight all but gone. “I appreciate it, but there are things I am doing that knowing about alone would probably get you in danger.” He sighed and his voice sounded oddly hollow. “Justice may have had a point there. But thank you for offering. I promise, I will not ask you anymore.” A sad smile on his face as he looked at her.

“Why are you smiling like that?” She asked curiously. 

Anders shook his head to himself as he got up from his spot on the floor. “I was just thinking. Had we met at another point in my life I think we could have probably been friends.” He didn’t see the brief flash of emotion on Cassia’s face as she stood and turned around. Despite their constant arguing she had been considering him as a friend for a while. 

“Well, who knows,” she tried her best to sound as non-committed as she could while she walked towards the door. “Maybe we’ll get there someday.”

 

\----------

_3 years later_

Cassia forced herself into detachment as she went through the entire house, room by room, collecting every single thing that reminded her of her mother. Carefully she put them into the large box she had with her. One by one. She had been dreading this. Pushing it off. Even trying to argue with herself that she should leave everything as it was. But she knew in her heart that she would never be able to find peace even for a moment if everything inside her house reminded her of Leandra. She spent the better part of the day being thorough about every little detail. Feeling numb and absent, as if another woman was wearing her body while she watched from the outside.

After locking herself up in her bedroom for days crying and raging against the ghosts of what happened she felt like she was all out of emotions. All out of sadness and grief. For a moment, as she put the now filled box away with what felt like the emptiness inside of her threatening to spill over she thought that she would have preferred the rage and the grief. At least then she had felt something. 

In a matter of moments she was dressed and out the door heading through the secret passage into Darktown. The lantern was off but she could still see his shadow move behind the half barred windows. A quick look made sure no one else was around as she slipped inside the clinic. 

Anders seemed surprised to see her. She took a deep breath and looked him with a stern expression. “You are still involved in the mage underground right?”  
It was more of a statement than a question and Anders knew that. He simply nodded.  
“Good. Tell me what you need me to do!”


End file.
